Saturday, June 10, 2006
When courtship doesn't work
BRIDGEPORT, MA -- After three months of marriage, Anne and Joe Toepe recently concluded that courtship is a failed experiment.
"We went through all seven principles of courtship," said Anne. "After we met at an ATI function, Joe began to sense God's leading toward marriage. He spent months in prayer and fasting. After seeking his parents' counsel, he called my father. They corresponded for a year, with my father giving him projects for spiritual growth."
Joe agreed. "Anne's father was committed to protecting his daughter, which impressed me all the more. I knew she was a pearl of great price."
"My father and mother eventually told me there was a young man interested in me," Anne continued. "They asked me to pray for God's direction before they told me who the young man was. I decided if my parents approved of him, God's blessing was on it."
Joe traveled from IBLP Headquarters to spend time with Anne and her family. Her parents and siblings were impressed with his character, and enthusiastically gave their approval.
Joe and Anne were married a few months later. Their wedding was a God-honoring ceremony, and a testimony to the effectiveness of courtship. Several couples who attended the wedding pledged to trade dating for courtship in their relationships. Joe and Anne touched for the first time when the pastor declared, "You may kiss the bride."
Now that Joe and Anne are married, they were shocked to discover that the courtship principles did not adequately prepare them for marriage! "We're constantly discovering new areas we'd never talked about before marriage," said Joe. "I just assumed with God and our parents' blessing that marriage would be easier."
"We disagree on things frequently," says Anne. "We fight more than Brad and Angelina in Mr. and Mrs. Smith."
Joe and Anne contacted IBLP to discuss their relationship. The ATI coordinator was grieved to hear their story, and encouraged them that the principles of courtship could be used to strengthen their marriage. "They told us to review the courtship booklet -- that maybe we did something wrong during the courtship phase," said Joe.
At this point, Joe and Anne became fed up with ATI. "We decided to trade courtship for dating." They are now happily dating.
IBLP RUNS OUT OF GOD'S GRACE
Dr. Gothard's new book helps Christians achieve new levels of legalism in their lives.
IF LEGALISM IS YOUR THING
THE ROOF IS ON FIRE!
Which one of you x-ers is responsible for this?
FRIENDS ARE EVIL
A recent survey of IBLP alumni revealed that 85% of attendees raise their hands when Mr. Gothard calls for a commitment because of peer pressure.
A TRAITOR AND A REPROBATE
An IBLP transportation driver was recently caught with a Dixie Chicks CD in his vehicle.
HOPE IS LOST IN ALABAMA
Please consider Hotel St. Gothard!
Friday, June 09, 2006
"Mighty Deeds" drinking game
Richard has several excellent recommendations for watching IBLP promotional videos.
Each year the Institute puts out a year in review video detailing the events in which the Institute participated. For example, 2005 was the year of Doors of Opportunity.
When we were in the Institute we used songs and "games" to get us through difficult events. In order to help us celebrate our fond memories of the Institute and yet still endure the trial these videos present, let me suggest: The "Mighty Deeds" Game!
During the video, perform Nine Mighty Deeds to Conquer Despair and Bitterness.
To do these mighty deeds:
Download the required video(s). Gather at least three more X-ers. Select your non-optional alcoholic beverages of choice and perform the following Mighty Deeds as indicated.
- Every time the word "Opportunity" is said, take a drink.
- Every time Mr. Gothard is called "Dr. Gothard" take two drinks.
- For every ridiculous statement drain your glass!
- For every attractive blonde put on the video, blow a kiss and take a swig.
- For every ugly brunette, take a drink THEN blow a kiss.
- For every video shot that has been structured so that the room looks full, take a drink.
- For every coordinator, manager, director or leader with acne take a drink.
- For every statement where the Church is mentioned in such a way as to make you think that the Institute IS the "church" drain your glass.
Note: You should feel very Mighty by the end of each year in review. If you are really committed to being Mighty, you can have consequences for those who show weakness and rewards for those who demonstrate their evident spirituality. For example, the first one to pass out has to volunteer at Indy for a year. Last one standing gets to do some PG-13 handholding with their significant other.* After all, if they can do these mighty deeds, they can obviously handle the temptations that arise from some physical contact.
*If they don't have a significant other, they can just hold hands with the "first one down" because where they're going, they'll be grateful for some attention.