Wednesday, February 02, 2005

How to Rid your Home of Evil Influences
Are you feeling oppressed, full of anger and bitterness, and struggling to come to grips with things that happened in your past? It may be time to cleanse your home of harmful influences.

First, walk through your home and identify anything that causes you to feel anger or bitterness. These could include:

all IBLP publications
navy and white clothing
certain music and videos (Year in Review, Instruments of Praise...)
red synthetic carpet
and/or faux-English decor
walkie-talkies
any photo of a group of people
in matching clothing
fancy Scripture calligraphy
any multi-step
directive (such as "10 Ways to Be More Enthusiastic")
grain mills
transparencies
hot rollers (for those long, soft curls -- hello ladies, time for a new hairstyle!)
character quality notecards
stick-figure
diagrams
anything containing the phrase "universal, non-optional"
brass lamps
Basic CARE bulletins
gifts from Bill G -- all those clocks!
name tags
long khaki skirts or jumpers
IBLP logo shirts
Denton Brothers courtship stories
your family coordinator's phone number
Large poster of Bill Gothard's face titled: Big Brother is Watching You

Grab a large garbage sack, fill it up, and haul it out of your house. Or build a bonfire and burn it all. Do not pass these dangerous items to another unsuspecting person. You may require several attempts to root out all the offending items, so keep at it until you no longer feel the evil influence.
-Submitted by guest poster AM

10 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Even sending it to the dump works really well.. I have almost totally succeeded in "cleansing my home" from all the insidious influences, at least physically, of IBLP. It's a wonderous feeling.. Like the world doesn't weigh so heavy on your shoulders for not doing everything the "right way." Finding my own way through this world has been much more pleasent. Dare I say.. Enjoyable.

6:03 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i have a friend that helped keep his house clean when he was younger, by taking and burning the wisdom booklets before his parents found out that they had gotten them.... play it cool for a few days, and his parents would foget about it, assuming that ATI had forgotten to send them or something....

7:12 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I just can't force myself to get rid of my well worn Treasures of the Snow VHS tape... It's the ring that binds me... It consumes my thoughts... my dreams.. nevermind

8:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Considering how much tuition costs, I'm skeptical that your friend's parents would assume that ATI forgot to send the WBs. Maybe your friend wasn't as clever as he thought he was.

3:53 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Been there, done that! It was very freeing to cleanse my home of this material and clothing!

9:06 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

About Treasures of the Snow: Neither can I! I can't get rid of it!

11:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

And to think I was one of Christopher Denton's first piano students. Also to think that our family was instrumental in their enrollment in ATI.

1:33 PM  
Anonymous pepper said...

You forgot the juicer!

For breakfast we had juiced vegis, beets, leftover salad, oranges, carrots, garlic, mango, lettuce, broccli, and mango.

I don't think you can fully get rid of the evil influences in your home if you have that for breakfast!

~Pepper~

10:10 AM  
Anonymous Pepper said...

You forgot the juicer!

For breakfast we had juiced vegis, beets, leftover salad, oranges, carrots, garlic, mango, lettuce, broccli, and mango.

I don't think you can fully get rid of the evil influences in your home if you have that for breakfast!
~Pepper~

10:11 AM  
Anonymous kirstin said...

whatever you do, DO NOT tell me a Denton Brother courtship story. I remember being at a training center when one came thru with his finace. They went thru the food line with their hands in each other's denim pockets. I dont want to know how manny innocent students were forever corrupted that day.

4:38 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home

X-ATI Guy

about

recently

archives

approved books

approved music

exits

censored words

credits

contact