Thursday, July 29, 2004

How to Survive a Shakedown
A shakedown is when an ATI authority seeks to bring a student to the realization of his sins.*  The person in leadership "counsels" the student until the student agrees he is in sin and offers to make a public apology.  The shakedown technique has been used by the Gestapo, the mafia, and military intelligence, but it was perfected by ATI.  If you work or volunteer for the Institute, chances are you will face a shakedown at some point, so we offer suggestions on how to survive.
  • Sit very still.  Do not make eye contact with the authority.  Respond to the interrogation with small whimpering noises.
  • Resist appeals to your conscience.  Disagree with everything the authority says.  "Don't you think you exhibited a rebellious spirit?"  "No!"
  • Run downhill.  ATI leadership is fast, but cannot run downhill.
  • Plea bargain.  "I'm not going to admit to watching a movie.  Let's say I owned a country music CD."
  • Don't get caught in the first place.
  • Avoid billiard tables at all costs.

  * The shakedown is also known as a pool stick session, deriving its name from a movie in which a crime boss tortures a "rat" in his organization.  The crime boss gets the traitor to confess by tying him facedown on a billiard table, hitting him with a pool stick, and placing the pool stick in uncomfortable places.


Anonymous Justin said...

haha, I'm a natural. I used that exact sequence when I was having my "so I'm quitting ALERT coz it sucks" exit shakedown. It was effective, I believe.

9:46 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

When I was at the Indianapolis Training Institute I played an "April Fools Joke" on some girls. I was 19 at the time and already discovered that ATI was off on many things and was aware of where I stood: under the conviction and freedom of Christ alone. I was also much more confident and secure in who I was and what I other words: they didn't scare me. I respected them, but I knew that they had no real authority over me. I was taken into the Shakedown after the girls, in their righteous indignation, told on me. I went through all their tactics but I chose my words carefully and did not allow myself to be pulled into their side-tracked arguments. I maintained sanity, gentleness, and respect throughout the shakedown. I watched with inside humor as the guy trying to break me became more and more frustrated that he could not be "sucessful". They knew that I was not a pushover. I think it scared them! Not too long after graduating from one of their "programs" I was supposed to continue on for 9 months of service with them. Instead of being put with other girls, and bcontinue being an influence on them, I found myself enjoying a room to myself and the leaders didn't force my every move. In fact, I often skipped breakfast and even slept in! I didn't stay the full time. I knew it was a waste. All of the "information" I was receiving was nothing compared to the time I was losing in really reaching out to people and loving others with Christ's love. It's not about blue and white and whether or not I can sing a worship chorus, it's about getting into the community and being God's hands and feet to the world.
Isn't one of Satan's tools to get us distracted from the real Gospel and instead make up a bunch of rules (like the pharasees) to argue about?

4:10 PM  

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