Sunday, September 12, 2004

ATI Announces New Program
The Advanced Training Institute has announced a new program for young men of unique dedication. The program, called The Castrati, is designed for those who want to dedicate themselves to God's service above all else.

The program is based on a Scriptural concept offered in Matthew 19:12. "...and there be eunuchs, which have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake. He that is able to receive it, let him receive it."

Bill Gothard announced his great enthusiasm for the new program. "Scripture promises great rewards for those who follow this practice of becoming eunuchs," he said. "In life, there are regular Army Christians, and there are Marine Christians, and then there are The Castrati. They will raise Christian service to new heights."

ATI promises that those who give up the comfort of home, family, and children will find true success in the Christian life, citing the examples of Christ and the Apostle Paul. Young men who enroll in The Castrati must go through a rigorous evaluation period to determine they have made the proper Christian commitments. After selection for the program, they leave home permanently and begin a training program at various IBLP locations. Upon completing the five-year training and the necessary alterations, Castrati young men will serve the Institute for the duration of their lives.

Incidentally, there are no longer 10 Unchangeables:
  1. Birth Order
  2. Time in History
  3. Race
  4. Nationality
  5. Gender
  6. Parents
  7. Brothers and Sisters
  8. Physical Features
  9. Mental Capacity
  10. Aging and Death


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Of course they will be true Eunichs, right??? Cause taking them out of the gean pool might help ;^)

8:37 PM  
Blogger Brooks Lampe said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

9:16 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Can we say, Roman Catholic Priests? Watch out Cadet boys...

2:59 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Funny, but somehow inconsistent with the mandate to procreate. Guess they'll have to visit the sperm bank before going into this program.

6:16 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Will the castration be performed by Bill, a medical doctor, or a mid-wife?

6:08 AM  

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