X-er's ATI Student Records Questioned

OAK BROOK, Illinois - The Advanced Training Institute today released X-ATI Guy's student records, revealing that X-er missed a required spiritual examination while on staff with the Institute. The records show X-er failed to make most of the 17 Basic Commitments essential to spiritual maturity, and avoided a meeting specifically scheduled for him to go through the Stronghold Diagram. A typed memo from X-er's supervisor, a Mr. R.E. Porter, is especially damning. Porter confessed in the memo to himself that he had received pressure to "sugar coat" X-er's alleged poor service with IBLP. Porter speculated the pressure was due to X-er's ties to "large IBLP donors."

IBLP said in a release: "We trust the public will see that X-ATI Guy cannot be trusted, and he should stop reviling the dedicated men and women who owe so much to this ministry. These records prove X-ATI Guy is a bitter person."

X-ATI Guy immediately responded by attacking the authenticity of the records. "I believe this is nothing but a coordinated attack on my credibility," he said in his own statement. "It's no coincidence these records were released almost immediately after I broke the story about EXCEL being a secret society." X-er said the "commitment sheet" IBLP is circulating is obviously a fake. "I know that's not my signature because when I was in ATI I always wrote in caps."

X-er also stated Mr. Porter's memo is a ridiculous fabrication. "I am not acquainted with any large IBLP donors, although I do know some overweight ones." Furthermore, X-er pointed out Mr. Porter was an amputee and could not manipulate a typewriter. "So how did he type a memo to himself?"

-posted by X-er at 5:57 PM