Tuesday, January 04, 2005

Contacts Make Rebel-Spotting Difficult
IBLP officials are concerned that designer contact lenses allow rebels to live in sin by artificially brightening their eyes. "For years we've identified the mighty in spirit by their bright eyes," said one training center director, "but these new contacts make rebel-spotting very difficult."

Dorian Black, a prominent IBLP staffer, has worn bright-eyed contacts throughout his time with the Institute. "It's nice, because I can acutally sin once in a while without fear of reprisal," he said. "Now that they're catching on, I probably won't last for long."


Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is unnecessary and distasteful. Any truly gifted subversive knows that simple eye drops before staff meetings, lunches and any other meetings with "Heavy G" and/or his top brown-nosers.

12:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Eye drops??? Damn, why didn't somebody tell me?

12:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I always thought it was because of the Russian vodka in the system... Hey it's funny and in some ways not.. Due to the the system-wide brainwashing during the Russian kick in ATI where the bright eyes myth first sufaced I spent years in fear of walking past any "true" ATI leader and them instantly noticing that my eyes were dark and I was in complete sin and rebellion. What a waste of brain use...

4:24 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


What how can this be? A young man who doesn't just listen but SINGS that evil ROCK and ROLL and he calls himself Bright Eyes? He must be using them dang contacts to fool us all..

5:28 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

mmmm...Russian Vodka...mmmm...good...

3:51 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This site is very funny. I too am X ATI, and I must say the whole cultish group thing was a bit weird. but all hail the almighty Bill GotHard.

12:08 PM  

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