Friday, April 15, 2005

An Open Letter to IBLP Staff

Dear Dedicated Young Men and Women,

Foolish men will tell you that working 80 hour weeks for less than minimum wage is a waste of your time and talents. They fail to realize that at IBLP you are also compensated by marvelous food and rich fellowship. Singing The Smile Song in 16-part harmony while working in the dish pit will store up more rewards in heaven than a hefty checking account or phat bling.

Other men may make their fortunes selling worldly goods or hormone therapy; you--you are in the business of the soul. Selling character is a higher calling, and it calls for extreme dedication. You are to be commended for giving up worldly treasure, the comforts of home, and the freedom to develop a relationship with the opposite sex. IBLP continues to grow and expand because of your faithful commitment to avoid dangerous soul ties.

The compensation, of course, is the high level of trust your IBLP leaders invest in you, and their abiding faith that you always attempt to do what is right. Only in the "real" world (or the U.S.S.R.) would your employer attempt to inspire you to perform free work by using catchy slogans such as "Doing Mighty Deeds" or "Such a Time as This."

In IBLP, you do not suffer the indignity experienced in the normal workforce of working for individuals far less qualified than yourself to be in positions of leadership. No, though they be mere children, or though nepotism seems to run rampant, you can rest assured that God wills it.

Should you ever enter the World's workforce, you will do so as an ambassador of character. Your resume will contain pages of volunteer experience and you will understand the danger of ungodly cliques. But let me warn you: re-entry can be harsh. Without the Walkie of Power, many former IBLP staffers feel weak and impotent. Sinful men will not notice your bright smile, and ungodly employers may actually try to take advantage of your skills.

Fie upon those critics who insist on casting asperations upon your employer. How many other young men or women can say they work for a man who has sent out 2.5 million birthday cards?

As you perform the day-to-day tasks God gives you, you can trust him to bless you in ways you never imagined. While you're thinking about it, let's buy another training center.

Be Strong,

X-ATI Guy

11 Comments:

Blogger Semirrahge said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

8:41 AM  
Blogger Semirrahge said...

Amen and Amen.

X-er, once again I am inspired by your words of cynicism. Perhaps it is wrong of me to see the negative in the midst of such overwhelming good, but for those of us who have been there - it helps to know that we are not alone, that our pain is known and understood by at least a few more people out there.
Continually I wonder why it was so hard for me to break free from something so obviously detrimental - and continually I wonder why it is so hard for me to get my friends to see what I have discovered.
Ken Pierpont may talk about those who would 'cheapen' grace, and as I've mentioned before: if cheap equals free, then yeah, I believe in cheap grace - But I prefer to use the term "priceless".
However he may rant and rave, I would quietly like to point out that his grace is exactly what he rails against: License. License to abuse those who trust you. License to set yourself above your fellow man. License to ignore the hurting of the lost because of some sick sense of cosmic "justice". License to re-shape the Word of God to fit your interpretation - on the grounds that the common man cannot understand the Word as written.
Men may say, "You sound like you have some issues!" Yeah. I've been hurt and bad - and I'm just a man. It's going to take some time for me to let go of it all, and by God's grace I shall, in time, be free.
I apologise for hijacking your thread, but let me leave with the immortal words of Patrick Henry:

"Gentlemen may cry, Peace, Peace -- but there is no peace. The war is actually begun! The next gale that sweeps from the north will bring to our ears the clash of resounding arms! Our brethren are already in the field! Why stand we here idle? What is it that gentlemen wish? What would they have? Is life so dear, or peace so sweet, as to be purchased at the price of chains and slavery? Forbid it, Almighty God!
I know not course others may take but as for me: Give me liberty or give me death!"

Edit: Sorry, I mis-quoted Mr. Henry the first time.

8:44 AM  
Anonymous Invictus-Christian said...

Strange coincidence, semirrahge. I was scheduled to do a paper on that speech, after, of course, having left my calling to "ministry" in ATI and opted for an evil, secular, and (gasp!) worldly state university, where I hear curse words and "ground taking" rap music every day! (which is much more evil than just plain rock music). I know I'm beyond any help a diagram can give me to take back, oh, it must be absolutley hundreds of acres of "ground" from Satan. Sorry, I'd much rather believe in Purgatory. 7 deadly sins are much easier to deal with than countless iniquities and unconscious Satanic influences.

Although X-er's posts are funny, and, needless to say ingenious, they are also sad because I knew so many people that took that type of Christianity (if you can call it that) seriously.

Milton: "Alas, what can they teach and not mislead, ignorent of themselves, of God much more."


Invictus-Christian

10:08 AM  
Blogger Seabhag said...

I just did a post on my blog about people who blieve extreme things that give the rest of Christianity a bad name. The willingness of people like Mr. Pierpont to condemn those who don't see the Bible as saying the exact same that they do are a shame to the rest of us.

Seabhag

3:59 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Go, Go X-ATI Guy!!! You need more publicity for your aweseom web site. Get Mr. Gothard to subscribe!!!!!111!

2:02 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh my gosh, Mr. P is telling everyone his son is spiritual and Godly! lolol!!! I was at the inn for a few months and heard "Chuk" (why the heck is he spelling his name that way now I have no idea) play the Red Hot Chili Peppers on his guitar and sing along. He was always humming songs that had just come out too so I know he listens to the radio in his room. Everyone there (at least when I was there) knew that. Mr P must be the only one who doesnt. Sad, sad sad...

8:08 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well, it looks like Mr. Pierpont has removed any controversial comments in his post about Chuk...

9:05 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It is people like the Pierponts that have made my parents decide to leave ATI.

1:43 AM  
Blogger DixieGrits said...

Ohmygosh, this is rich! Therapy to the soul for those of us who were trapped for far too long!

11:51 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

good post. i also like the comment about the "Red Hot Chili Peppers" etc.

2:18 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i completely forgot about Billy G's major life purpose of sending out bday cards. That is so cool. He is very proud of that too. he will tell anyone that he has sent out a ton. Doesn't anyone find that a little absurd ?
SWEET motivational letter, maybe I will go back to hq's after 10 years. Whoops, I'm tattooed all the way down my arms.

12:26 AM  

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